You beat cancer, you’re all good now… right?
Many people see cancer survivors as - "you beat it, you're all good now".
One thing the pandemic has done is give people, especially those with families, a deeper understanding of what it means to be with them, and with friends. I have seen so many people retire, move their careers to another location, and even start a home-based business, purely because they have now truly seen the importance of being with family as much as possible.
Yes, we did...however, for many of us we are also still battling.
For many, the daily battles of our own minds are enough to sometimes bring us to our knees.
Every niggle, every pain, every feeling of energy drain - can trigger thoughts of 'It's back', 'what if it's cancer again' etc etc.
- I feel drained today......it's back.
- That pain in my arm.....must be a tumor.
- I have a headache.......what if it's cancer?
Our logic tells us it's probably not, however, the fear of what we went through comes flooding back.
The games our mind is playing are powerful. So powerful it can be debilitating. We may seem all good on the outside, however, we are good with masks, we learned how to use them perfectly due to putting on a brave face for our family and friends.
We knew they were going through a horrible time watching us suffer.....however, we needed them to feel better and be happy - so we put that brave face mask on. Now we use it when we are on high alert inside.....so others think we are all good.
I've used them often........I can be at a business event smiling and full of energy, yet if you could see inside my mind it's in total disarray and intense sadness and fear - because it's 'one of those days' or something happened to trigger the fear.
Fear of recurrence is common in cancer survivors. Whilst it may fade, for many it will never completely go away.
Many times over and over we tell ourselves - today is the day I stop thinking like that. Then......another niggle.....and the fear starts again.
In the last 12 months, I've done a lot of work on this. I really had to start working on it when I found myself with thoughts of
why is this person being negative towards me, don't they know what I have to deal with mentally on a daily basis?
Why can't they just be happy for me?
If you know someone who has battled cancer, please please please think about that when you go to speak 'about them', speak to them, interact with them, do things that may affect their lives. They have fought so incredibly hard to be alive.....they deserve you to give a second thought to how your actions may affect them.
Now I'm not saying to treat them differently to others, just give more thought to 'how' you are treating them, eg. with respect, with honour, with kindness, with compassion.
It's not just cancer survivors, however, - I really believe we all need to show a lot more kindness to each other in this world.
If you are feeling this as a cancer survivor, 3 tips I can give you right now that will help are...
1. Look after your body.
Do whatever you can to minimise your exposure to toxic ingredients and find high-quality products from companies who put people and planet first, and are transparent.
One example of this at the moment is the huge rise in need for hand sanitisers... however, some of them contain ingredients that are linked to concerns over cancer. That is not negotiable for me. If there are 'concerns' that's enough for me to find something else. Take some time to do some research into the ingredients, and then find a pure natural alternative. Luckily for me, I was already using one from a company who only uses plant-based ingredients.
I also chose to bring essential oils into my life, turn to completely natural supplements, and toxin-free makeup etc, and the amount of research I had to do before I did this was huge. Why? Because the industry is not regulated and unless you can find a company with total transparency and can show you the whole process from planting the seed to bottling the product - you will never know the products are completely clean. (If you want to know more head to my Clean Living page which is a ‘no-pressure sales’ space where you can see what I’ve been using for the last 13 years).
Ultimately, look after your body by doing your homework on ingredients.
2. Don't put off follow up appointments
I know this is a huge issue for many. Myself included. Sometimes living in the 'not having to deal with it' bubble puts our mind at ease....whilst also causing more fear to strike. I get it. I live it still sometimes.
Going for that appointment, and 'if' they find something, means we have to live with daily fear again, instead of 'sometimes fear'.......however we need to counter that with.....if they find it early enough......
If you need to, find something that takes your mind away from the tests happening. Throughout my whole treatment and any follow-ups, I've always sung the song 'Brave' by my gorgeous friend Kate Ceberano, in my mind. It is my way of remembering how amazingly brave I have been, and can still be.
3. Keep Busy
This one is the one that really helps me.
Keeping busy from my very active family, however, also having my own home-based business has been incredible.
It has given me even more purpose.
I used to be a 9 to 5 career woman.
Now I fill my days with reaching out to others and helping them through my speaking, coaching, blog, book signings, businesses, sharing my story, business inspiration, and ideas on how I swapped to clean living, and the joy it gives me - from someone telling me it's made a difference in their wellness and happiness - helps me remember the positive impact I'm having and showing my girls we can all make a difference in this world.
Finally, click here to watch this video, I thought I'd share especially for those fellow cancer survivors out there. This is a fabulous way to put those thoughts at bay - and flick the mindset switch to one of strength and a reminder that we were strong enough to beat it once.....we can do that again..
Naomi Dyer is a Bestselling Author, International Speaker, Internationally Certified Results Coach, entrepreneur, and cancer survivor. She's a beacon of resilience and empowerment, whose journey through adversity inspires audiences worldwide.
If you would like to learn more, see her story, or book her to speak at your event visit www.naomidyer.com.au
